As a young girl I couldn’t wait to grow up. I have always been very independent. As soon as I started walking…I was pretty much on my own. Not really…my parents were there, but for me…I had life figured out. I mean…I could walk…I was free and life was just beginning for me. Soon after…I was dressing myself…I can brush my own hair…I can do it “by myself.” If only my parents had a dollar for every time I said that.

The independence never stopped, neither did dreaming about tomorrow. I couldn’t wait to be old enough to spend the night with friends. I would fight with my brothers and daddy and couldn’t wait to move out. I wanted to be sixteen, eighteen, in college, then twenty-one. See the pattern. I was so focused on tomorrow and what my future held, that I would forget to live in today.

I let the future of tomorrow ruin my life for such a long time. It ruined relationships or could have been a blessing in disguise. Either way, it caused problems. I watched the clock tick at work just to rush home. Counted down the days until girls night. I was looking for the next big event that was happening in my life.

You know the saying…”you aren’t guaranteed tomorrow.” I have heard that all my life but one day I woke up and it really hit me hard. I realized that part of my unhappiness was because I wasn’t enjoying living in the moment.

“Do not delude yourself, tomorrow is not guaranteed; and even if good fortune brings you your tomorrow, there is no guarantee those you love will be a part of it. Do not squander your precious, limited time. Value what love you have in your life – nothing is more valuable. Make it known to those who matter.”
― Wayne Gerard Trotman

At 37, I’m very happy with my life. I love the journey of living daily and not expecting what tomorrow holds. I am not perfect at it and I still struggle at times. I have learned to enjoy the ride and tackle each day on it’s own. I have slowed down and try to take in each minute. There is great relief in knowing that God has my future. All the good comes from God and the struggles are lessons to be learned.