A man can’t raised kids alone, much less try to raise a girl. They can’t teach a girl how to fix her hair, wear make-up, or how to just be a girl. I was raised by a man, my daddy; and he didn’t teach me those things. How was he suppose to. He didn’t have much hair, he didn’t wear make-up, and he’s not a girl. Now don’t get me wrong, some men are plenty capable of doing all the girly things. My daddy just wasn’t made for that. He did teach me how to be a person. He taught me respect, how to keep my word, to work hard, and most importantly mind over matter.

Working hard was not only expected in my house, it was required. When I started a sport, I had to go to every practice and every game. I wasn’t allowed to quit in the middle of a season. I had to finish what I started. I signed up for a season; my coach and teammates were counting on me to be a part of the team. It wasn’t just about me anymore. I had made a commitment and I had to keep my word. I cried, I fought, and I begged to quit sometimes, but he never gave in. I was so mad. I didn’t understand. It was just so stupid that I couldn’t quit. There were other players and some were better than me; they could just take my place. That’s what I would express to Daddy, but he still made me play. The lesson – he wasn’t being mean. He was just teaching me to follow through with the commitment I had made to others. I had no idea how this lesson would help me for the rest of my life. Some times I still want to quit and I can hear my daddy in the back of my head, “No, you have to finish. You signed up for this.” And I still dreadfully finish, but not without and huff and puff. Yes, I still talk back to my daddy under my breath and in my head; even when he isn’t really talking to me. Ha!

My daddy and I not only share the love of sports; we both enjoy running. Running wasn’t my first love. I actually didn’t like it much as kid. But Daddy ran a lot and would even win races. When he would leave the house for a daily run, he would always ask me if I wanted to go. My answer was usually no and I told him I couldn’t keep up. One day he finally said, “Just run with me. I will go slow and we will only go as far as you want.” I wasn’t really sure how true that statement was, but I took it as a challenge. I was like…this is cool, he’s finally letting me be in charge. I never got to tell him what to do, so I was like heck yeah. Maybe he just played reverse psychology on me but it worked. We went for a run together, and it was hard. I’m not sure how far we ran, but all I can remember is…I didn’t make it back home. I had to stop at the end of the street. My legs were broken, my chest hurt, and my lungs were about to stop working. Ok, none of that is true, but that’s what I felt like. I stopped, sat down, and said I’m done. It was lame because I could literally see my house when I said that. This is one time, Daddy let me stop. I think he could see how hard I tried and must have known I was going to push myself until I really fell over. I sat down and watched Daddy finish running to the house. How did I get home? No, I didn’t walk, remember…my legs were broken. I made daddy come back and get me in the truck. As, always a lesson came from this too.

“Mind over matter,” he said, “Do you know what that means?” My only answer was, “no.” I was too broken to think. He said, “If you don’t mind, it don’t matter. Your body may be hurting and what you are doing may be hard, but you have to tell yourself it doesn’t matter. It’s mind over matter. It will only hurt for a little while. Keep your head in the game. Don’t let what bothers you stop you from finishing. You will be happy once it’s over and you will be proud you did it.”

Mind over matter. The greatest lesson anyone has ever taught me. I carry this message with me daily. It’s the light bulb that comes on when I am struggling. When life is hard, mind over matter. I tell myself…I don’t mind, it’s only for a season, and later, it won’t matter. I grew to love running and when my legs feel broken, my chest hurts, and my lungs are about to stop working…I keep going. I find myself repeating mind over matter. It will only hurt for a little while. When you’re done, you’ll be glad you finished. I love my job, but sometimes it’s just too much. Mind over matter. This day will soon pass and you will forget the worries of the day. This one little phrase has had the biggest impact on my life. It has gotten me through some of the hardest times. It has never let me down and has always proven to be true.

MIND OVER MATTER – IF YOU DON’T MIND, IT DON’T MATTER!